Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Eating Correctly - A Dedication to my father.

The Muslims in a pinch eat Kosher. Halal will only get you so far. They are slightly less anal as concerns dietary concerns as the Jew's but still completely meshugga. My Muslim friends carry more fear and guilt about eating correctly than all the fucked up Jew's with milk, meat and Chinese food dishes in their homes.

Let me tell you about a problem I had a couple of years ago. I went to the House of HIllel grocery store to buy some Jell-O. Why you ask? I'll tell you, I had the munchies, I was stoned. So I get there and it's Shabbas and the HoH is closed. So I run across the street to Mohamed's quicky mart (here in the hood we call it Mo's) and buy some Halal Jell-O. As I'm paying, MO says to me, "Stoner Jewboy, you can't eat the Jell-O until tonight". So I asked him how he knew I was a Jew and how he knew I was stoned.

Well it turns out, he see's me go to the HoH all the time, and I just ran in to buy Halal Jell-O, and it's 2 in the afternoon and I'm not buying anything else, obviously I'm stoned -

But the bad news of the whole story was...While it was Shabbas, it was also Ramadan. I wasn't allowed to eat the Jell-o until sundown :)

-----Original Message-----From: solco co <compco@bell.net>To: Helen Baumgarten <helenu1@yahoo.com.au>; Judy Cohen <judycohen@sympatico.ca>; Norman <normcohen@mail.com>; Shelly <ishel@videotron.ca>Sent: Wed, Nov 18, 2009 11:00 amSubject: It's so nice to be Jewish
#AOLMsgPart_2_fe857a22-eeb1-42a2-aac4-f6edf741cce4 #AOLMsgPart_2_34be86ea-d328-4f54-803e-ebe338c28c92 .hmmessage P{margin:0px;padding:0px}#AOLMsgPart_2_fe857a22-eeb1-42a2-aac4-f6edf741cce4 #AOLMsgPart_2_34be86ea-d328-4f54-803e-ebe338c28c92 body.hmmessage{font-size: 10pt;font-family:Verdana}
About Glatech
Glatech Productions is the sole producer of Kolatin® Real Kosher gelatin and Elyon® kosher confectionery products.
Glatech Productions was founded to develop a high quality Real kosher gelatin, which can be used for the rapidly growing Kosher industry. As the need for Real Kosher gelatin increased, Glatech Productions began mass producing in the U.K. a high quality Kosher gelatin sourced exclusively from hides sourced in the USA and are now producing in Mexico on an ongoing basis. There have been many gelatin companies over the years, which claimed to produce Kosher gelatin. However, since those gelatins are obtained from non kosher hides or bones they have not been accepted by any major Kosher-certifying agency in the U.S.A., Canada or most of the world.
Glatech Productions registered the name Kolatin® Real Kosher Gelatin in order that this genuine Kosher product not be confused with those non Kosher sourced gelatins. Therefore, Kolatin® is the only bovine Real Kosher gelatin which is certified by the Union of Orthodox Jewish Congregations (the OU) using hides sourced from the U.S.A. as Kosher, Pareve, Kosher for Passover, and is accepted by kashrus organizations worldwide. It meets the highest standards of kashrus and quality.
Glatech Productions quality control specialists monitor all phases of gelatin production to assure customers that Kolatin® Real kosher gelatin conforms to the strictest standards of purity and kashrus. Kolatin® Real kosher gelatin surpasses domestic and worldwide regulatory requirements as well as customer specifications. Glatech Productions offers gelatin with characteristics that comply with each customer's unique product specifications. The exceptional physical properties of Kolatin® Real kosher gelatin make it a high performance ingredient in food products and pharmaceuticals. =
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Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Here Sugar...Here Girl....I've Got A Carrot For You!


SC man gets 3 years in prison for sex with horse

Wednesday, November 04, 2009 8:39:55 AM

A South Carolina man caught on video having sex with a horse was sentenced Wednesday to three years in prison after pleading guilty for the second time in two years to abusing the creature.
Rodell Vereen was also ordered never to go near the stable where the horse's owner caught him and held him for authorities at shotgun point over the summer. He apologized to the woman and to himself after admitting to buggery at the Horry County courthouse.
"I'm sorry about what I've done. I didn't mean to do it. It's my fault. I'm sorry for what I've done to myself," Vereen said during Wednesday's court hearing.
Vereen was arrested in July after Barbara Kenley caught him entering the barn at Lazy B Stables in Longs, about 20 miles northeast of Myrtle Beach. She had been staking out the stable for more than a week after setting up a surveillance camera and videotaping Vereen's assault on her 21-year-old horse named Sugar.
Kenley said she became suspicious because her horse was acting strange and getting infections, and she noticed things were moved around the barn and dirt was piled up near the horse's stall.
It wasn't the first time she'd caught Vereen. In late 2007, Kenley found him asleep in the hay after assaulting her horse. For that offense, he also pleaded guilty to buggery, received probation and had to register as a sex offender.
On Wednesday, the judge sentenced Vereen to five years in prison, but he will only have to serve three years behind bars as long as he successfully completes two years of probation. Vereen also was ordered to undergo additional mental treatment after he gets out of prison and was told to stay away from Kenley's stable.
Kenley told The Sun News of Myrtle Beach she was mostly happy with the verdict, but wished Vereen had got more prison time.
"I've been through hell for the last year and it's caused a lot of hardship," Kenley told the newspaper. "There's a lot of ridicule and jokes going around about this thing. And a person can only take so much."
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Sunday, November 1, 2009

News Update


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PETA et al

I want a kitten. So I post this ad:

montreal craigslist > community > pets
please flag with care:
miscategorized prohibited spam/overpost best of craigslist
Kitten wanted (Nun's Island)
Date: 2009-10-31, 11:38PM EDTReply to: mailto:comm-pvdc9-1446320339@craigslist.org?subject=Kitten%20wanted%20(Nun [Errors when replying to ads?]
I'm looking for a baby kitten. It's gonna be my pet until one of us expires. I'd prefer a short haired, preferably not a shedder (if the mother is a shedder, no thanks) and preferably not all black young cat. Please call me at (514)892-0355
Location: Nun's Island
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1446320339

And I get this reply:

kitten
From:
Matt ernest View Contact
To:
comm-pvdc9-1446320339@craigslist.org
** CRAIGSLIST ADVISORY --- AVOID SCAMS BY DEALING LOCALLY** Avoid: wiring money, cross-border deals, work-at-home** Beware: cashier checks, money orders, escrow, shipping** More Info: http://www.craigslist.org/about/scams.html
go to a shelter and get an adult cat.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1bpDE6Vx_QUthe kittens are going to get a home, trust me

So I write this reply:

Re: kitten
From:
Jeb View Contact
To:
Matt ernest
Thanks for the public service announcement. Go do something worthwhile with your life if you're going to be a do-gooder. Go fight terrorism. Solve world hunger. Save the fucking whales.

I want a baby kitten. Now please take your unsolicited advise and shove it up your ass.

I hate idiots! On the other hand, thanks for the inspiration for today's blog.

Is it just me? FUCK!
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